Yoda recruited by Supreme Military Council
Written by Makarona Jul 5th, 2011
State TV broadcast live footage yesterday of the first meeting between the Supreme Council of the Armed Forces (SCAF) and newly appointed "Wisdom Advisor" Yoda. It remains unclear why Yoda has decided to join the dark side of the force at this time. Questions are also being raised about how the green sage -- long presumed to have died in a galaxy far far away -- made his way to Cairo in the 21st centry. Currently,...
Delay behind Mubarak prison transfer uncovered
Written by Makarona Jun 17th, 2011
Despite repeated confirmations that former President Mubarak would be incarcerated in Tora Prison once his health improves, this has yet to happen – even after being spotted in his hospital wing last week playing the hula hoop while listening to the 90s smash hit I’m a Barbie Girl. Now inside sources have confirmed to EKT that the real reason for the delay is due to a missing component from the engine expected to...
EKT to recommence
Written by Makarona Nov 8th, 2010
Dear EKT readers, When the World Cup began last June, EKT staff escaped to Turkey for a mystical Sufi retreat after Subar Lox saw an ad for it in Al-Waseet. We hoped the one way journey would give us time to contemplate the void left by Egypt’s failure to qualify. Unfortunately, after spinning in circles for days on end and still not being able to shake off our depression, we finally gave up on enlightenment and...
Woods Pens Major Sponsorship Deal with Aazra'
Written by Subar Lox Mar 11th, 2010
After a career-threatening scandal, Tiger Woods penned a deal last week with Egypt's controversial 3arza2 sex shop to promote its products for as long as it takes him to return to golf. 3azra2, Egypt's first and only known sex shop, is hoping this major signing will help it recover from an earlier setback regarding its logo, which forced it to shut down. (Click here, then scroll down for more info about 3azra2.)...
Man Discovers Time is Relative
Written by Subar Lox Dec 23rd, 2009
Still in the Intesive Care Unit at Dar Al Amal hospital and almost out of hope, a man known only as Taayim believes time is relative. Mr. Taayim made the discovery in mid-air yesterday as he attempted suicide from the 6th of October bridge. He mumbled to an EKT correspondent through his body cast, "I was sitting in a taxi for five hours and we moved about one meter". Witnesses say they saw an exasperated Mr. Taayim...
